Parade Pandemonium

Every morning, rain or shine, snow or sleet, Rocky and Roly, the resident roosters on the farm at the Pleasant View Lodge, crow a mighty cock-a-doodle-do to awaken their fellow farm animal friends. Rocky and Roly take this job very seriously for they know that without their noisy alarm, the animals sleeping soundly in their stalls, will not have the good sense to rise, shine, and start their day. Well, except maybe for Sharlotte the sheep.

You see, Sharlotte is the exception, for she is as wise as she is old. Although her actual age is a mystery on the farm, it is estimated by the other sheep that she quite possibly and probably was born in the previous millennium. However, the answer to this question remains a mystery because it is not polite for anyone to ask her her age.

Herman, the German shepherd barn dog, awakened by the rooster's crow, sits up to gaze at the sunrise overlooking Mt. Pleasant. It is a stupendous sunrise of the most gloriously gleaming grains of green, beams of blue, yarns of yellow, reeds of red, pats of pink, and orbits of orange colors. Herman nudges his best friend, Harry the hound dog, to wake up and look at the sunrise with him. Harry happily joins Herman to heed the superb sunrise out the window.

At this point all of the farm animals are now fully awake and ready to begin their day. The sheep begin to graze. The goats and donkeys begin to eat their hay. Mr. Tom, the timid turkey, and Chix, the cutest chicken, peck the ground for insects. The barn cats, Carl and Casper, are busy curiously chasing field mice. The barn dogs, Harry and Herman, patrol the perimeter. The cows, Cappuccino and CoCo, meander nearby waiting to be milked. The pigs, Paulie and Petunia, snuffle and snort around in the messy mud. The Belgium bunnies, Sunny, Hunny, and Runny nibble on left over lettuce and fragments of fruit.

Hunny lifts her head from her yummy, leftover lettuce leaves, wiggles her little nose, shakes one of her ears, and says, "Sunny, did you know that lettuce leaves are actually more healthy to eat as a leftover?"

Sunny continues to nibble. "Interesting," he says without looking up from his lettuce leaf. "I did not know that, Hunny." Nibble, nibble.

It is during these early morning hours, before Farmer Fergus arrives at 8 am, that the animals hold their Morning Town Hall meeting. Sharlotte is the Matron of Ceremonies. She calls the animals to order.

"Hear ye, hear ye," says Sharlotte. "I call this morning meeting to order. We have important things to discuss. Namely," she continues, "the Farmyard Animal Parade." The animals, barely able to control their excitement, begin to chatter and fuss to each other. You see, the 100th anniversary of the opening of the original Pleasant View Lodge will take place in just a few days. A full day of festivities has been planned to honor this historical milestone.

"Order, order," says Sharlotte to the chatting animals, "as you know, the Farmyard Animal Parade will top off the day-long celebration. This parade will be the crowning glory of all the events of the day, with myself as Queen, of course." The animals once again break out in an excited chatter. No one wants to listen to Sharlotte anymore.

Herman, the German shepherd barn dog, is especially excited due to the fact that he is the great-great-great grandson of Herman, the first German shepherd barn dog, who was thus named in honor of Civil War hero General Herman Sherman. General Sherman was one of the very first guests to stay at Pleasant View Lodge when it first opened. Life was very different back in those days; there weren't even any cars, telephones, or TVs.

Herman is especially excited due to the fact that he is the great-great-great grandson of General Herman Sherman, the famous Civil War hero dog. General Sherman was one of the first guests to stay at Pleasant View Lodge when it first opened.

"Oh, Harry, I'm so excited," says Herman to Harry, the hound dog. "I'll be able to wear my great-great-great grandfather's gorgeous green ribbons. What an honor!"

"You're right, Herman," Harry replies, "it is a great honor. I'm looking forward to wearing the shiny shamrock and purple pastel clips used only for special occasions. You know, the ones with little gold rings and bells on them? We will look absolutely regal."

Ethel, the donkey, and her son, Evan, look over at Harry and Herman. "Regal?! I think not. You do know my mane will shine and the tail ribbons for the donkeys are by far the most beautiful ribbons ever made. They were sewn by hand and imported from India, a faraway exotic place I am told, where only the finest, fancy things such as these are made. The crowds of onlookers will behold our brilliant beauty and say, 'Those decorated donkeys are undoubtedly the best.'"

On the other side of the barn, the dairy goats snicker, sneer, and side eye the donkeys. "I assure you, Ethel," says Pumpkin Pie (one of the goats), "we goats will most certainly be the center of attention at the parade." With that, the goats turn around to show their back sides to the other animals.

Upon hearing Pumpkin Pie brag that the goats will get all the attention, the pigs, Paulie and Petunia, shake their heads and chime in, "Nonsense, the pigs will rule the parade perfectly that day, and you all know that."

Sharlotte only knows that she is on the brink of a full blown mutiny. Just then, Mr. Tom, the timid turkey (who bravely follows guests around to be friendly), ruffles his feathers, jumps up on a wooden water barrel, and displays his plumage in all its brilliant, bronze-green color. Mr. Tom rarely acts in this manner because he is rather shy, and the other animals are startled, rightly so. The chatter immediately subsides.

Mr. Tom speaks calmly. "My dear fellow farm animals. The Farm Animal Parade will be a great success because of each and every one of us. We are all in this together." The animals nod to each other in agreement. Some, like Ethel, are even embarrassed at their behavior and hang their heads in shamey shame.

"I'm sorry, everyone," says Ethel, "we'll all be beautiful!" Then all the other animals nod and humbly repeat, "Sorry" to each other.

Turning to the animals, Sharlotte says, "Now, we only have two more days before the parade. Let's all practice lining up and staying in a straight line, shall we?" And for the next few days, that's exactly what they did.

With perfect timing, the animals are reminded to conclude the morning meeting as they hear the whistle of the Story Train winding its way up Mt. Pleasant on Buffalo Road by way of old Moose Tail Overpass. The Story Train, an old fashioned locomotive of legendary acclaim, once carried Civil War soldiers across the overpass where moose would frequently be found frolicking with family in the fields of fresh flowers. Since a time before automobiles and airplanes, the Story Train has faithfully brought visitors to the Pleasant View Lodge. Each and every morning the old Story Train chugs and chugs and tugs and tugs up and down, up and down Mt. Pleasant on Buffalo Road. Conductor Hank Kincaid, (or just Conductor Hank as he prefers), carefully checks all the knobs and buttons that drive the train then pulls the whistle to announce their arrival at the Story Train Station.

This is a very big day at Pleasant View Lodge. Not only is it the 100th anniversary of when it first opened, but also the Farm Animal Parade! The Story Train chugs into the station overflowing with children and their families all filled with excited anticipation. As usual, Rocky and Roly have already announced the arrival of sunrise with their cock-a-doodle-do. The animals have rustled up from their sleepy slumber. Sharlotte bleats out the call to the morning meeting. The animals gather and great excitement fills the room.

"Good morning, everyone," Sharlotte says, "now settle down. I know you're excited about the parade. We've spent hours and hours practicing how to walk in a straight line, follow the leader, stay quiet, and — and this is especially meant for the bunnies, Sunny, Hunny, and Runny — we've practiced how NOT to leave the line to go off to find things to nibble."

But, as usual, the bunnies are too distracted by last night's leftover lettuce leaves to pay attention to Sharlotte. They choose instead, to nibble rather than to listen. Runny holds up a big piece of lettuce leaf and says to Sunny and Hunny, "I simply love leftover lettuce leaves; especially when I find fragments of fabulous fruit berries floating as the filling. Like a dash of dewberry, and a splash of strawberry, and a drizzle of dangle berry. Yummy in my tummy."

"Mmmmm, me, too," says Sunny wiggling his nose. "I don't think there is anything more delicious than leftover lettuce with fragments of fruit."

"It's my favorite," says Hunny.

"It's yummy. I shall eat all of it, not leave even one tiny leaf of lettuce lurking in the leftovers. There shall be no fragments of fruit falling over the edge, either." Runny bunny buries his nose in the leftover lettuce. "Yummy, yummy, yummy," says Runny.

The Pleasant View Lodge is overflowing with people today, not only with guests and their families, but with many local residents who rode in on the Story Train, all here to watch the Farm Animal Parade. Back at the barn, Farmer Fergus is busy lining up the animals for the parade. "Let's see," he says, "I think we'll have Sharlotte up front to lead the procession." With that, Sharlotte gives a bleat of "I told you so" and takes her place in lead position. The younger sheep follow behind her. "Next will be Mr. Tom and Chix, side by side. Goats are next." Farmer Fergus motions for them all to line up, which they gladly do, without commotion, chatter, or chaos. "Rocky and Roly, you two are next, side by side. Then Carl and Casper. Ethel and Evan, you two are next behind the cats. Then the pigs. Then the cows. And Herman and Harry, you two will walk alongside to keep everyone in line. Then last, but not least, the bunnies, Sunny, Hunny, and Runny."

Farmer Fergus inspects the line up. "It seems you have been practicing. Very good. Now just keep this together for the parade and everything will go smoothly. Remember, NO leaving the line."

"Not even if someone wants to pat us?" asks Mr. Tom, the friendliest turkey.

Farmer Fergus turns to Mr. Tom to reply, "No, not even if someone wants to pat you. Not even if someone wants to give you a snack. Not even for anything. You must stay in line."

"Come on, we can do this," says Mr. Tom, encouraging the animals. "Of course, we can," says Sharlotte, bleating out a strong bleat of confidence. The animals all hold their place in line and nod in agreement.

All of them, that is, except for the bunnies. They are too distracted by the clover that is growing next to them; juicy, ripe, pink blossoms of clover with big green leaves. They try to resist and pay attention to Sharlotte, but the unsuspecting clover demands their full attention. Hunger pains overtake their senses. "To nibble or not to nibble, that is the question," says Sunny. The bunnies, unable to resist, choose to nibble the crispy clover.

Unbeknownst to the bunnies, the choice to nibble alters the very course of history that day. Pleasant View Lodge will never be the same.

It is 4:00 pm, sharp. Time for the Farm Animal Parade to begin. Farmer Fergus leads Sharlotte out first, and the others follow. They stay in a well-behaved, straight line. The procession winds up the road from the barn towards the lodge. It is a beautiful, sun shiny day. Crowds have gathered to watch the parade of animals, who are decorated and dressed in all their finest and fancy ribbons, bells, holsters, and sashes.

Now, with all the attention on keeping the line straight and behaving, no one notices that the bunnies are not following behind. As usual, Sunny, Hunny, and Runny, are too distracted to pay attention. Even as the last animals in the parade, Ethel and Evan, leave the barn, the bunnies are still nibbling on the clusters of crispy clover.

Hunny looks up from her clover. "Oh dear," she says, "Sunny, we were not paying attention! We must hurry now and catch up to the parade."

Sunny and Runny look up and wiggle their noses. Not another animal in sight. "Let's go!" says Runny. "Yes, let's catch up!" says Sunny.

With that, they quickly bunny hop out of the barn in a panicked pursuit of the Farm Animal Parade.

As they hippity-hop through the parking lot up to the lodge road, Sunny shouts, "Look, I think I see Ethel and Evan!"

As the bunnies round the corner, ready to join the parade, they hop so fast that they run right through the middle of the parade. They did not stop because they did not know, since they were not paying attention when everyone else was practicing, that the animals were following Sharlotte, the leader, in a single file, straight line.

It does not matter right now, however, because in this very moment, as the bunnies run through the middle of the parade, Carl (the friendliest cat) lets out a loud, screaming screech before darting off into the woods. Then Casper takes off and follows close behind. A whirlwind of chaos and pandemonium spontaneously erupts on the grounds of Pleasant View Lodge.

Animals and people scatter frantically in all directions. Many of the animals seek shelter inside the lodge. Horrified guests run to the safety of their rooms.

The animals, left alone without human supervision, are free to explore and enjoy the lodge. Sharlotte and her group of sheep proceed to the magnificent ballroom to dance and look out the windows.

The goats proceed to play a game of tennis on the tennis court.

Pumpkin Pie and the other goats play a round of golf.

Ethel and Evan try a hoof at outdoor chess.

Cappuccino and CoCo make their way to the outdoor pool where they splash and wade with great delight.

Paulie and Petunia trot straight to the Pine Cone Restaurant where they sit down and help themselves to everything on the menu.

Mr. Tom, the turkey, and Chix, the chicken, meander to the Pine Cone Restaurant where they have the luxury of sitting at a table without fear.

Carl and Casper find their way back from the woods and take the stairs down to the gym to use the fitness equipment, take a sauna, and go for a nice swim in the indoor pool.

The mischievous bunnies, those three culprits who caused all the commotion and chaos, rest and relax on comfortable seats in the movie theater to watch an episode of Country Bunny and City Bunny.

Herman and Harry check out Sherman Sanctuary. They enter the room. Herman sees a painting on the wall. "Look Harry! I think that's my great-great-great-great grandfather, General Herman Sherman!"

Harry looks up at the painting and then back at Herman. "Yes! I think you're right, Herman," says Harry.

Meanwhile, Harry, having done his best to keep order during the chaos, finds his way down to the General Sherman beverage cellar. He sniffs every corner with great enthusiasm and wags his tail with approval.

"This means so much to me, Harry. I knew it was true, but now I see the truth with my own two eyes," Herman replies.

"You know what this means, Herman?" asks Harry, looking at Herman.

"I think so," replies Herman. "I think I must be the one to lead all the animals back to the barn. It's what my great-great-great-great-great grandfather would do, and therefore it is what I must do."

"Exactly, Herman, and spoken like a true hero and leader," says Harry.

Herman and Harry make their way to gather the animals. Herman proudly wears his great grandfather's medals. The other animals respect that and follow Herman to the lodge lobby.

A gentle calm and peaceful quiet replaces the confusion and chaos. People begin to open the doors of their rooms and peek out. Farmer Fergus is also in the lobby discussing a plan to retrieve the animals.

All of a sudden, whom do they see? None other than Herman, in all of his Civil War hero dog regalia, leading the animals! "Herman," Farmer Fergus says in surprise. "Your great, great, great, great, great grandfather, General Herman Sherman, would be so proud of you!"

All the animals, yes, even the bunnies, stand in the lobby, in a single line without chatting. Herman motions for them all to march forward. The straight line of animals, properly positioned, proceeds through the lobby, out the front door, and down the steps to the lodge road. People bravely gather once again along the parade route in the hope of seeing this epic example of excellence.

Farmer Fergus need only walk next to, not lead, the animals. They follow Herman back to the barn where it is time for them to rest and sleep. Herman and Harry trot proudly alongside, their tails held high.

"This has been the most exciting day," exclaims Sharlotte. "It sure has," agrees Pumpkin Pie.

Nighttime descends upon the White Mountains of New Hampshire. The moon rises. Stars twinkle and light up the sky. "Look, there's the Big Dipper," exclaims Carl. The animals sleep safe and sound in their stalls and cages.

Another day will soon begin at Pleasant View Lodge farm. You hear Rocky and Roly begin to stir and stretch from their sleepy slumber. Once again, it is time to remind the animals to rise and shine, and they crow a mighty cock-a-doodle-do.